What got me to here?

Yes, that's a question I've asked myself many times. What happened to make me want to give up all that is familiar and safe to lead a nomadic lifestyle? Well, I can tell you this, it wasn't one thing. It was a combination of thoughts, inspirations and happenings. I guess I'll start at the beginning.

For the past several years, since my youngest grew up and flew the nest, I've been looking for purpose. I bought a business that I thought was going to be my salvation, but ended up being an excellent lesson in resiliency, patience and letting go. Due to the nature of the business, the timing, and a lack of business savy, I lost that business and spent the next seven years paying for it. It was hard times. Luckily, I had an excellent career to fall back on that saved me from personal ruin. I paid my dues, worked hard and finally came out on the other side.

Life after that was pretty good. I started getting ahead and having hope. Then a dysfunctional relationship helped to reshape my world. I learned who I was, what I stood for and what I would and wouldn't put up with. I finally learned the meaning of boundaries, self-love and self-respect. And yes, I worked hard (emotionally) and I also came out on the other side of that.

It wasn't then that the seeking began. I've always been a seeker. But it became a little more desperate. A need to replace the lost comfort of raising a family, a known career and a sense of self. So I jumped in (as I always do) to find myself. I coached, I painted, I created, I moved. Until these things no longer brought me the peace that change usually brought. It was then I started thinking of REALLY changing my life. My whole life. Moving. Far away.

The Dream

At first, I dreamed of moving to Italy. I fantasized, I researched, I even went there. Then it became apparent that wasn't the place for me - I didn't speak the language, understand the culture, and couldn't get permits to stay. So my dreams turned to France. I spoke the language (somewhat), I understood the culture (somewhat) and I could get permits to stay. So I fantasized, I researched, I even went there. But it wasn't for me. Then, I thought about moving to Calgary, Canada. Not a far away move (only 1000km) but I had family there. It was then the news came.

My youngest daughter was pregnant. I was going to be a grandmother, a 'mimi'! I was overjoyed. Except, she lived in Arizona, USA - not only far away, but a country I couldn't get permits to stay for more than six months. But the pull in me was strong. The family, the purpose, the love. I was trying to figure out how I could go there.

When talking to a friend one day, I started saying, "if only I could put everything in a trailer and just go there". What?! Where did that thought come from? Yes, I'd been thinking about moving for a very long time. I'd fantasized and researched. But a trailer? The more I listened to my words, the more it started to click something inside of me. A home on wheels. I could go wherever I wanted (almost). I could try new places, feel my feelings, experience new experiences. Wow! That was the moment the seed took root.

Letting it Unfold

From there it all fell into place. It was the beginning of February. I researched what to buy. A van, a motorhome, a trailer? When was the best time to buy? How? It works out there are two great times to buy a trailer: end of summer (missed that) and spring RV shows. I checked it out, and the big spring show locally was only two weeks away. A sign? Then I researched what to get. I decided on a travel trailer. The question was could my vehicle tow it? Well luckily for me, it could tow a 3500lb travel trailer (maximum weight). I was in the ball park. Another sign?

I won't give away all the details in one sitting. But suffice it to say, everything lined up perfectly. I talked to many people. I researched a lot. And the funny thing was, not one person said it was a bad idea! In fact, many said they had considered it too. When I asked AI if it was a crazy thing to do for a woman my age, it said it was "empowering". That was how I wanted to feel. Empowered.

Now I am days away from beginning this journey. All of the planning, the preparation, the research is done. How am I feeling? Emotional. Thoughtful. No regrets. Let's see what the future brings.